Ever feel numb? like you don’t know if you feel anything anymore? i do. i do a lot. I have to help myself feel things again. I made a trip out to Graham today… to pick up our new car. It was interesting to say the least. “Sergeant air wave” came on the radio of course. I didn’t know what to feel about that. memories are swirls for me. I found myself talking about you a lot. I couldn’t help it…i wanted to see if you were there, but i didn’t at the same time. What’s weird is that i finally broke down about it last night, which was odd. I think i feel better about it now but what a coincidence that our new car was maybe a mile away from the last year and a half of my life. I wish things weren’t the way they are between us. I wish i could come see you. I wish i could see you exactly how i used to see you, as the sweetest most caring guy in the world. but i can’t see you that way anymore, i feel like all of those memories were lies. How can you feel like you know someone better than you know yourself…and then not know them at all when it comes down to it. I dunno, i’m hoping time heals everything.